It Was A Dark and Stormy Night...

...and Patrick was out of town for work.

The house was quiet, the kids asleep, and I was trying to sleep.

I could hear every creak and bump as I tried to rest in our old and creaky little house and pretend that this night was the same as every other night when Patrick is home.

2:00 a.m. I heard something.

A distinct thump.

Then again.

It was coming from outside the house, JUST outside the house.

Man was I getting freaked out.

There was someone, or something just outside our back door!

Just like the not-so-bright victim in a scary movie, I grabbed the flashlight and went to investigate.

On the way down the stairs I could hear scratching noises!

Now I was really freaked, I also grabbed the phone, with 911 dialed but not executed.

Just in case.


Then I shone my flashlight right into the beady eyes of the burglar who would threaten my family (and our trash). When he saw me, his cockiness allowed him to simply push over the garbage can, look at me for a photo op, and casually saunter away.